Scars

Hayden Kho's documentary of his sexcapades has been out for sometime now. Katrina has gone to the senate and now she has asked the authorities to cancel Vicky's license. But this post wont be about Katrina. She has had a lot of publicity already so I wont waste time on her.

I have been thinking of blogging about the other girl in the video, Maricar. I have to say that I admire her. She kept mum about the scandal and last Sunday she held her head up high during the Star Magic anniversary. I have to admit that everytime the camera would focus on her I felt sad for her. But the sadness is just fleeting after all as a woman I am proud of her for handling this kind of storm in her life with grace. She could have fight this scandal but she chose not to because she knew better. She knew that reacting to it would only make things worse than it already is and can continue to do more damage. Maybe this is her way of doing damage control.

Its just right for her not to hide after all she has done nothing wrong. Her only mistake was to love a pig disguised as a good looking doctor. There is nothing wrong with loving someone. She just loved the wrong guy. I guess right now she is just waiting for this scandal to die (although it may take a while) and for the scars to heal.

Better Father

I am well known for wearing my heart on my sleeve. Oh yes! That's true and I will never regret each day that I do. Since today is father's day allow me to be me after all I will be talking about my great loves - the men in my life.

My Tatay

I should have known better. I should have believed that father knows best. There were a lot of times in the past that I have not heeded to his advises and believed that I knew better. It was only these recent years that I said to myself " I should have listened to Tatay" . Saying that does not mean that I regret the decisions that I've made on my own. Saying those words was confirming that he only wanted the best for me and that he believed in me. Its my way of saying that "Yes Tatay you were right. Things could have been better if I listened"

He never reprimanded me for the wrong decisions. He never tried to control me. He was just trying to be a better father.

My Husband

He is trying hard to become a better father. Although to me he is a perfect dad already. But I guess its up to our children to say what kind of father he is.

And you know what he is 80% like my father. Just the way I wanted. Just the one I prayed for.

To my Tatay and Hubby, Happy Father's Day!

Healed?

Wounds leave scars. Scars would remain for the rest of your life.

But how about the other type of wound? Do they leave scars?

How long do they heal? How would you know that it has healed?

Is it when you no longer cry over the pain? Is it when you feel nothing when you see the person who caused you pain? Is it when you have forgotten about the pain?

How?

I still cry. I still feel the pain.

I have not fully recovered.

I have not moved on

I have not forgiven.

The End Of A Summer Affair

Who? Me?

Oh no! Not mine but my son's summer affair.

They said he was too young. I said there's no harm in trying. If it makes him happy then why not?

I wont mislead you more. I am talking about Lance's Summer Stepping Stones Class.

He puts an act everytime he sees his bag and pretends he's leaving for school.

L: Bye Mommy. (waves his hand and carries his back pack) I am going to school na.

That made me think that he was ready so I asked for Hubby's approval and enrolled him. We even had school hunting before that. When we found a school that we liked (facilities, location, teachers, not to mention that the directress was a UPian - I know I am clannish!) we enrolled him and prepared for his summer classes.

The first week went well, surprisingly. He wakes up early and dresses up enthusiastically for school. He followed a routine. We followed a routine religiously. I loved it. I loved it because I have been trying to let him follow a routine but I know it cant be unless I will stop working and be a SAHM.

Sadly after 2 weeks his interest diminished. It was harder to wake him up. He had tantrums and wouldn't want to dress into schoolwear, just pajamas, after every bath. That was our cue that it was ending.

I called the directress and informed her about Lance. She hopes to see him next summer though. I will definitely enroll him there not because the directress is UPian but because I liked the school.

This is where the summer affair ends. And here are the keepsakes of that love affair:

Addicted to Boys

Pardon me for the picture overload.

Boys Over Flowers that is. Who could resist these good looking guys?

This Korean version of Hana Yori Dango was ok in most of the episodes but I didn't enjoy it much towards the end. Seems to me they were trying to fast track the story.

All in all I liked this better than Meteor Garden. This version was "easy" to the heart.

Oh by the way, I love Goo Joon Pyu!

Great Moms

For the arms to be my shelter through all the rain

For truth that will never change

For someone to lean on
For a heart I can rely on through anything

For that one who I can run to...

For a shield from the storm

For a friend, for a loveto keep me safe and warm

I turn to you

Today we celebrate the greatness of moms all over the world.

I was lucky to have met a lot of wonderful mothers in my life.

For one there's my Nanay - she's simply the greatest! I wish I had her calm disposition and composure. From her I learned what a mother's love should be. Her love has made me passionate, responsible and independent.

My Lola A is my other mom. She's my paternal grand mother. She treated me like a princess - until now! Her love taught me to be simple despite her lavish show of affection.

Another mom in my life is Mama, my mother-in-law. Her love was nurturing.

Different moms, different kind of love but they were all great moms.

Happy mothers day to all mommies!

Calm

Everything is calm after the storm.

It was raining hard the whole day yesterday. I think Metro Manila was on storm signal number 1 yesterday. Thank God it was only signal number 1 here because Emong hit hard in Northern Luzon specifically Dagupan City.

Yesterday while I was out for an errand I was already thinking of spending my Friday (which is Today) in bed. I thought it will still continue to rain hard today but when I woke up everything was so still. No sound of the pouring rain and the wind. That was my sign. I knew it even before looking out of the window that the Emong is gone.

I was still in denial. Without looking out of the window I turned on the tv to check on the weather and their it was – the confirmation that I needed, Emong is already leaving the country. I was a bit disappointed.

While I was having breakfast, the calmness I felt when I woke up this morning kept on coming back. It lingered. Is my life really chaotic for me to appreciate such brief moment of calmness?